Dispatches with Hollie McKay
Dispatches with Hollie McKay
Words that Never Leave You: "A child just needs to be loved."
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Words that Never Leave You: "A child just needs to be loved."

Part Four in an ongoing series from Hollie's book "Words That Never Leave You: Fifty Pearls of Wisdom and Reflection from Survivors Across the World."

TRANSCRIPT. PODCAST FEATURING HOLLIE MCKAY & DENNIS SANTIAGO. (Please excuse typos, edited for clarity)

DS: “Words that Never Leave You” by Hollie McKay, featuring “Fifty Pearls of Wisdom and Reflection from Survivors Across the World.” Today, we are going to ponder the quote: a child just needs to be loved, Hollie. Tell us about why this quote has so much meaning.

HM: This quote has stuck with me for a long time. I remember living in Los Angeles in my early 20s. You know, starting out as a journalist, well, I was young but had already been doing it several years at this point. But it was very concerned financially. Journalism, unless you're in that, very, very small 0.2% at the very top in that you're an anchor or the star of a show where you're making millions, pretty much everybody else is struggling to survive. It's definitely not a job you go into thinking it's going to be incredibly lucrative financially.

And in my 20s, I remember just getting these tiny little incremental raises based off a very small starting salary and thinking, gosh, if this continues at this pace each year, even when I reach 10 years and the age when I want to have children, it's going to be incredibly difficult. I don't know how I could possibly do this while continuing to do the job I love. I remember lamenting a lot of this to a colleague of mine who was older. She was in her 50s, and she'd already had a son very young and he was already grown up. But I remember sort of the first thing that she said to me was: a child just needs to be loved. And she said that is what matters, and that is all that really matters.

That really stated me because I thought of how important those words were that even though I'm surrounded by this very LA world where people were constantly talking about their fancy cars and their nannies and all the sort of expensive schools they were sending their kids to and that just sort of seemed like something very impossible to me. I really appreciated those words because again, it reminded me that the translucent trappings of materialism, of stretching ourselves to put on a show, those things at the end of the day, don't matter to small children. They're not observing these things. They're not noticing these things. I think that at the end of the day, what is so important is for a child to be loved. And I have taken that with me ever since.

DS: Wow. Well, it is a very good lesson as a parent myself, I very much relate to that, that is really all the child looks for in you. They don't really care about anything else other than that when they reach out, it your hands that they can reach or that when they ask for a hug, they get those things. Those things matter. Now for a follow-up question. So here you are today. It's 2023 and you're on the verge of starting that journey yourself. How have these words guided you as you prepare for your own child?

HM: Yeah, it's been a difficult time for me, I am having my first baby, due at the end of summer, my baby girl. It has been a challenging financial time. I was laid off my job at the end of my first trimester, and it's been a bit of a difficult slog since then. It is a problem quite unique to women. Can you get another job pregnant? What are the ethics? We can go into that another time but yes, those words I've had to constantly continue to remind myself of every day. I may not be in the position necessarily to that I thought or that I'd hoped that I would be in at this point of my life and my career, but I think as long as I can show my daughter how much she is loved, I have to remember that that definitely is what matters.

DS: Yeah. Speaking of someone who also went through career challenges while having children. They just need to be loved and I think you're going to do a very fine job if you if you care about this child anywhere near how you care about the rest of the world, it's all going to be fine. And thank you for sharing those thoughts. That is a quote from a book that's turned out to be quite poignant and personal and we thank you for sharing that with the world. So, until next time.

HM: Please get your copy of “Words that Never Leave You.” You can get that off Amazon. It's on Kindle and also order it on paperback. It's filled with fifty things that have really stuck with me in my journeys around the world.

DS: And it is a very good book. I endorse it completely and I am enjoying the fact that you are getting to talk more about each of those quotes and these kinds of interviews. They're very, very special. Thank you very much.

HM: Thank you, Dennis.

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